Taking back the Margins, regaining “Control”

I have decided/realized that I need to regain “control” of my life. So with that in mind, I have taken a six month leave of absence from Grad School, dropped to one day a week at my part-time job and tried out for my church’s production of Godspell. I have also started going to the gym three to four times a week and put myself on a low-cal high protein diet. I am weighing myself once a month but not focusing to much on that as it is more about liking my body than being a light-weight.

It is time I start doing what I would like to do and focusing on me, to be selfish for a bit, and not everyone else. I found that the more I kept trying to make others lives easier the harder mine got and the sicker I became.

Let me tell you, the minute I turned in the leave of absence and verbalized to my boss that I needed to cut back, it was like this HUGE weight had lifted off my shoulder. Now what would be even nicer, is to have what my friend Elizabeth has. (*aside* J LOVE YOU GIRL and I am only jealous in a good way. I really think you needed this and am happy that God has given it to you. Its funny how we as humans won’t do what we know is good for us because we are so afraid of what others think.)

So anyway, my Mum has decided to give it one more go and I have promised to play mediator to their discussions. Please pray that my Mum will talk to my Dad in a way that shows that she does love him and that my Dad will listen, absorb and open up to her. I know they love each other but they are both going to have to give in order to get what they want. That’s what marriage is, isn’t it, a team effort, a relationship of compromises and sacrifices. We’ll see, I just know I can’t handle having to go through another separation threat. This one was so real it was scary and I had no idea what I was going to do.

I thank God for all my friends though, who surrounded me with love and prayers. There is no way I would have made it through the pit without them and God.

Oh and another new skill I learned I had…making bows. Since I discovered it, I have been making bows for people almost everyday. Christmas is like the one holiday that the whole Pentagon gets into. Everyone, and I mean everyone, decorates their doors.