It's that time of year...

You know what I'm talking about! That time when everyone decides, with the best of intentions, to make New Year resolution's that will change their lives and better the world.

But why is that less than a month or two later, we have already forgotten what it was we wanted to do or in fact just given up. Don't people ever get tired of the thought of failing that they really do want to stick to it and finish something?

I for one am tired of making resolutions only to give up a couple of weeks later. So this year, I intend to do something about it. I am almost 27 years old and tired of the monotony of life. So my goals (not resolutions) are as follows:

1. Take risks and find fun in life.
2. Stick with the gym for real this time.
3. Lose the 20 lbs I gained after college.
4. Enter and complete one marathon. (whether it be a short or full-length one)
5. Let go of the past and move forward.
6. Proceed with getting my ancestry visa.
7. Graduate from being a contracted employee to the Gov't, to being a Gov't employee (better benefits)
8. Honestly make a concerted effort to read my Bible every day.
9. Write at least one letter to a friend or family member a month.
10. Travel to Arizona to visit with my Aunt and her husband.
...will finish this post later when I have more time to think.

Happy New Year's from our Nation's Capital.

*aside* how sad is it that I am glad I get Tuesday off. I mean I feel terrible for the Ford family but all it means for me is an extra day off. Oy I really need to rethink my thought proccess.

YIPEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I AM BACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THANK YOU JESUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

For all of you who know me, know that I am a big theatre person. My major in college was communications focusing on the dramatic arts. Well since college the only "acting" I have done is making it through each day of life. Well this past Sunday I tried out, along with 20 other folks to get a role in Godspell.

I found out today that I was cast as one of the eight parts. I AM SO STINKIN EXCITED!!! It is a musical and I get to put my musical talents as well as my theatrical talents to use!!! I am so very very excited, as if you couldn't tell!

Taking back the Margins, regaining “Control”

I have decided/realized that I need to regain “control” of my life. So with that in mind, I have taken a six month leave of absence from Grad School, dropped to one day a week at my part-time job and tried out for my church’s production of Godspell. I have also started going to the gym three to four times a week and put myself on a low-cal high protein diet. I am weighing myself once a month but not focusing to much on that as it is more about liking my body than being a light-weight.

It is time I start doing what I would like to do and focusing on me, to be selfish for a bit, and not everyone else. I found that the more I kept trying to make others lives easier the harder mine got and the sicker I became.

Let me tell you, the minute I turned in the leave of absence and verbalized to my boss that I needed to cut back, it was like this HUGE weight had lifted off my shoulder. Now what would be even nicer, is to have what my friend Elizabeth has. (*aside* J LOVE YOU GIRL and I am only jealous in a good way. I really think you needed this and am happy that God has given it to you. Its funny how we as humans won’t do what we know is good for us because we are so afraid of what others think.)

So anyway, my Mum has decided to give it one more go and I have promised to play mediator to their discussions. Please pray that my Mum will talk to my Dad in a way that shows that she does love him and that my Dad will listen, absorb and open up to her. I know they love each other but they are both going to have to give in order to get what they want. That’s what marriage is, isn’t it, a team effort, a relationship of compromises and sacrifices. We’ll see, I just know I can’t handle having to go through another separation threat. This one was so real it was scary and I had no idea what I was going to do.

I thank God for all my friends though, who surrounded me with love and prayers. There is no way I would have made it through the pit without them and God.

Oh and another new skill I learned I had…making bows. Since I discovered it, I have been making bows for people almost everyday. Christmas is like the one holiday that the whole Pentagon gets into. Everyone, and I mean everyone, decorates their doors.

God speaks through music that I so desperately needed to hear

Okay I hit rock bottom the other day and realized the only thing I had left in life to live for was God. I had reached the point with all the crap going on in my life that the only thing left for me to do was to believe in God because if I didn't believe in Him then I would be utterly hopelessly and completely without any reason to live. The next day I started looking at things and life through the eyes of a person who realized that no matter how much they sucked and wanted to try so hard to make everything right they couldn't. The only person who could was the only thing I believed in at the moment. God brought a dear friend back into my life at a time when I was no longer praying for them, I had utterly given up any hope of being friends or ever finding this person again. He also gave me a new friend who is going through a very similar if not the same situation that I am. God and only God knew exactly what I needed without me having to say a word. He is the only explanation I can make from what has happened since Thanksgiving.

Then this evening while downloading music I was listening to my iPod and the first two songs to play were ones I so desperately needed to hear and be reminded of. Now I am not saying life is a bed of roses, it still sucks, I still wish that I could crawl into bed and never get out but there is some hope and I know that I am not on my own. He is there and when I am least able to hold myself up He is holding me.

Praise You in This Storm
By Casting Crowns

I was sure by now, God You would have reached down
and wiped our tears away,
stepped in and saved the day.
But once again, I say amen
and it's still raining
as the thunder rolls
I barely hear You whisper through the rain,
"I'm with you"
and as Your mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise
the God who gives and takes away.

Chorus:
And I'll praise you in this storm
and I will lift my hands
for You are who You are
no matter where I am
and every tear I've cried
You hold in your hand
You never left my side
and though my heart is torn
I will praise You in this storm

I remember when I stumbled in the wind
You heard my cry to You
and raised me up again
my strength is almost gone how can I carry on
if I can't find You
and as the thunder rolls
I barely hear You whisper through the rain
"I'm with you"
and as Your mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise
the God who gives and takes away

Chorus

I lift my eyes unto the hills
where does my help come from?
My help comes from the Lord, the maker of heaven and earth
I lift my eyes unto the hills
where does my help come from?
My help comes from the Lord, the maker of heaven and earth

WHO AM I? By Casting Crowns
Who am I?
That the Lord of all the earth,
Would care to know my name,
Would care to feel my hurt.
Who am I?
That the bright and morning star,
Would choose to light the way,
For my ever wandering heart.

Bridge:
Not because of who I am,
But because of what you've done.
Not because of what I've done,
But because of who you are.

Chorus:
I am a flower quickly fading,
Here today and gone tomorrow,
A wave tossed in the ocean,(ocean)
A vapor in the wind.
Still you hear me when I'm calling,
Lord, you catch me when I'm falling,
And you've told me who I am. (I am)
I am yours.
I am yours.

Who am I?
That the eyes that see my sin
Would look on me with love
And watch me rise again.
Who am I?
That the voice that calmed the sea,
Would call out through the rain,
And calm the storm in me.

Bridge&Chorus 2x

I am yours.

Whom shall I fear?
Whom shall I fear?
'Cause I am yours.
I am yours.

I GIVE UP!

In a Pit With a Lion on a Snowy Day

I started reading my Pastor’s book yesterday. I think I was avoiding it for awhile because I knew that when I read it I would have to face the lions in my life and start chasing them instead of running away. I think I was waiting and hoping that God would just fix me without me having to do anything. But it doesn’t work that way, I have to be first willing to be fixed and then willing to look at my life and realize what it is that needs fixed and then take before my Father and ask Him to help me fix as only He can. I don’t know why it takes me so long to figure things out like this. I mean maybe it helps to have that constant reminder of the wreck and pathetic mess of a human being I become when I try to do it myself. All I can say is, and I know I’ve said it before, but I AM SO GLAD THAT MY FATHER NEVER LETS ME OUT OF HIS HAND!!!!

Some good points that I came across while reading the first 3 chapters.
1. God is in the business of strategically positioning us in the right place at the right time. But the right place often seems like the wrong place, and the right time often seems like the wrong time.
2. Too often our prayers revolve around asking God to reduce the odds in our lives. We want everything in our favor. But maybe God wants to stack the odds against us so we can experience a miracle of divine proportions. Maybe faith is trusting God no matter how impossible the odds are. Maybe our impossible situations are opportunities to experience a new dimension of God’s glory.
3. A.W. Tozer “A low vie of God…is the cause of a hundred lesser evils.” But a person with a high view of God “is relieved of ten thousand temporal problems.”
4. Maybe it’s time to stop placing four-dimensional limits on God.
Maybe it’s time to stop putting God in a box the size of your cerebral cortex. Maybe it’s time to stop creating God in your image and let Him create you in His.
5. The more we grow, the bigger God should get. And the bigger God gets, the smaller our lions will become.
6. How you think of God will determine who you become.
7. Half of spiritual grow is learning what we don’t know. The other half is unlearning what we do know.
8. It is the failure to unlearn irrational fears and misconceptions that keeps us from becoming who God wants us to be.
9. When we read Scripture, our brains are rewired in alignment with the Word, and we develop the mind of Christ.

So long, farewell, come back soon!!

So recently a good friend finished his four year stint in the Marines. We were all excited for him but at the same time very saddened. Kurt is originally from Green Bay, Wisconsin which is over 900 miles from Washington, DC. He has garnered many close friends here and we are very sad to see him leave. He's probably one of the few people I know who had not one but multiple good-bye parties. We will miss him greatly here in DC and will pray for him to return home to us all soon.

Eijit

Now about 5 or 6 years ago, I “invented” this word, thinking it was a great term for an idiot without calling someone it and them knowing what I meant. However while visiting in Scotland this past Sept. I discovered to my dismay and awe that I was not the original inventor. I was up in the Orkney Islands and had stopped to shop in a quaint little town. Well there were these cute little mugs with terms on them and their definitions, kind of like our mugs that make use of American slang. Well as I was reading over the terms I came upon one that I knew by heart. It was EIJIT!!! And the definition was……drum roll please……rat a tat a tat……a person who is considered to be an idiot!!

All I could think was how in the world, say what?!?! It was incredulous. A word that I thought I had invented was Scottish slang for the same word that I had created it to be for. (make sense?:-) or am I confusing everyone?) I was shocked and amazed because I had never been to Scotland before, I know that my Grandmum had never used the word and I know that the only Scottish brogue I had ever heard was Sean Connery’s and I hadn’t heard him use it. Nothing like vicariously living as a Scot without knowing it. WHOO HOO!!! I most definitely am Scottish!!

MY COMPUTER DIED!!!!!!!!!!

This could be the last of my entries for a short while, until I figure out the problem and get back online. PLEASE PRAY HARD THAT GOD will reinstate my computer.

MY COMPUTER DIED!!!!!!!!!!

This could be the last of my entries for a short while, until I figure out the problem and get back online. PLEASE PRAY HARD THAT GOD will reinstate my computer.

A few of my favorites

These are a few of my favorite photos from Scotland

Daisies at Dunvegan Castle

Boat on Loch Lomond

Leaving Skara Brae

Butterfly, bumblebees and a flower

Loch Lomond

(this is the place where I go when I want to get away from the world and dream of "home")

Next year I can see this place whenever I want. It is only about an hour from Glasgow. I can't wait until the day when I am finally at "home."

New Developments

So it seems as I age I garner allergies to me. Before I turned 21 years of age, I had never had an allergy in my life. The only thing “wrong” with me was that I was extremely accident prone. However when I turned 21, it’s like my body flipped a switch. I started having major problems with dairy to the point that I went from a size 10 to a size 4 in one month. Now for some folks they’re probably thinking, what’s wrong with that, I would love that to happen. Yeah well let me just say you would not want it to happen the way it happened to me. I was sick all the time and suffering from severe lactose intolerance until they figured that for the problem. So dairy was cut from my diet. I went out for a hike with some friends and discovered a weird allergy to some weird mushroom that grows off the side of trees in the woods. That was whack! I couldn’t breathe and my face and eyes swelled.

Now I have discovered I have a sensitivity to latex and adhesive. I keep discovering these things due to reactions and not getting tested. Well last night I had an allergic reaction to something I ate. It was awful! I was itching everywhere and anywhere it was possible to. I mean my eyes, my hair, my feet and well just EVERYWHERE. I have decided that it is time to take action and set up and appointment with an allergist. I want to know what all my allergies are before I accidentally discover one that may or may not be life threatening. Oh and Benadryl makes my very sleepy and the side effects last forever on me. YIKES!!!

On a good note though, my friend Pete from college is coming into town this Thursday and Friday. I am very excited as I haven’t seen him since he graduated from college back in, boy I think it was ’04. He is going to be attending a seminar my Pastor is giving on right-brained preaching and then meeting with him and a couple of other Pastor’s the next morning. I am looking forward to having a little bit of time to catch up with him.

And yet another thought/question…

Being right-brained means using the creative portion of your brain rather than the left-brain which is everything done from rote memory and habit. What do you think the Christian’s responsibility to being right-brained should be? Do we have a responsibility to be creative with the knowledge and abilities God has given us and if so why do most Christians instead choose to hide this portion of who they are? Has the “Christian” church taught the children of God that to be creative is to be a sinner? Why don’t more Christians take the unique and wonderful gifts, that God has created each of His images to have, and use them to further His Word and Will? Just some thoughts/questions from someone who grew up in and went to school in an environment where the staid and true was pushed rather than the creative and unique.

The Weekend Update :-)

What a weekend! On Sat. I met up with two friends for breakfast and then we headed to Gettysburg, PA to do some “hiking”. I say that in quotes because we didn’t really end up hiking as much as just exploring Gettysburg again. I hadn’t been there since I was twelve and JennO had never been there. Kurt who had just been there about two weeks ago drove and gave us the shortened auto tour. We did get out and walk about for a bit, climbed Little Round Top and Big Round Top too. I will post some pictures when I can get them. It was a good time and when we got back we changed real quick and met up with one more friend to go to the Washington Capitals hockey match. I hadn’t been to a hockey match since I was in 9th grade. I actually really enjoyed it!

Sunday, I worked at the café until mid-afternoon. I met with my small group after work and then headed home. I hung out with my roomie and the down stairs roomie for a bit then we all headed downstairs to catch the Eagles/Cowboys game. Now I can’t stand either team but I really can’t stand T.O. more than I can’t stand the Eagles. So all that to say that I was eagerly cheering for the Eagles to cream the Cowboys and rub it in T.O.’s face for the way he screwed them over last year. And boy did they ever! It was a great game and a close game all the way to the final seconds. By then I was utterly exhausted and headed upstairs to nap before going to my other small group. Well I was so exhausted I didn’t wake up when my alarm went off. I ended up sleeping right through it. I got up around 9pm and chatted with my other downstairs roomie for a bit and then hit the sack again at 11pm.

Monday I had to open the café but I didn’t have to go to my full-time job!! That was great! So I got done at the café and went home and went back to bed until 11am. It felt so wonderful. I got up and went to the Portrait Gallery with my friend Kurt and then headed back home and chilled and cleaned until I headed back into the café for the small group that I help out with. Over all it was a great weekend and I finally caught up on all that sleep that remained so elusive upon returning to the States.

GIRLS

Found this one someone's myspace and thought it was perfect and right. :-)

------------------------Girls------------------------
-------------------are like apples-------------------
---------------on trees. The best ones--------------
--------------are at the top of the tree.-------------
-----------The boys don’t want to reach------------
---------for the good ones because they’re----------
- --------afraid of falling and getting hurt.-----------
--------Instead, they get the rotten apples----------
----from the ground that aren’t as good, but easy.---
So the apples up top think something wrong w/ them
-----when in reality they're amazing. They just------
--------have to wait for the right boy to -------------
-----------come along, the one who's----------------
---------------brave enough to----------------------
------------------climb all---------------------------
------------------the way---------------------------
-----------------to the top--------------------------
----------------of the tree.--------------------------

The little hints!

Its funny how when God decides He wants you to realize something or remember something, He just keeps impressing it upon you. Not only through reading His Word but through what your friends tell you and even when watching a random tape that you’ve seen before and kind of just sit through a second time.

JAMES 1:2-27
2 Consider it all joy, my brethren, when you encounter various trials,

3 knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance.

4 And let endurance have its perfect result, so that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.

5 But if any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all generously and without reproach, and it will be given to him.

6 But he must ask in faith without any doubting, for the one who doubts is like the surf of the sea, driven and tossed by the wind.

7 For that man ought not to expect that he will receive anything from the Lord,

8 being a double-minded man, unstable in all his ways.

9 But the brother of humble circumstances is to glory in his high position;

10 and the rich man is to glory in his humiliation, because like flowering grass he will pass away.

11 For the sun rises with a scorching wind and withers the grass; and its flower falls off and the beauty of its appearance is destroyed; so too the rich man in the midst of his pursuits will fade away.

12 Blessed is a man who perseveres under trial; for once he has been approved, he will receive the crown of life which the Lord has promised to those who love Him.

13 Let no one say when he is tempted, "I am being tempted by God"; for God cannot be tempted by evil, and He Himself does not tempt anyone.

14 But each one is tempted when he is carried away and enticed by his own lust.

15 Then when lust has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and when sin is accomplished, it brings forth death.

16 Do not be deceived, my beloved brethren.

17 Every good thing given and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shifting shadow.

18 In the exercise of His will He brought us forth by the word of truth, so that we would be a kind of first fruits among His creatures.

19 This you know, my beloved brethren But everyone must be quick to hear, slow to speak and slow to anger;

20 for the anger of man does not achieve the righteousness of God.

21 Therefore, putting aside all filthiness and all that remains of wickedness, in humility receive the word implanted, which is able to save your souls.

22 But prove yourselves doers of the word, and not merely hearers who delude themselves.

23 For if anyone is a hearer of the word and not a doer, he is like a man who looks at his natural face in a mirror;

24 for once he has looked at himself and gone away, he has immediately forgotten what kind of person he was.

25 But one who looks intently at the perfect law, the law of liberty, and abides by it, not having become a forgetful hearer but an effectual doer, this man will be blessed in what he does.

26 If anyone thinks himself to be religious, and yet does not bridle his tongue but deceives his own heart, this man's religion is worthless.
27 Pure and undefiled religion in the sight of our God and Father is this: to visit orphans and widows in their distress, and to keep ones self unstained by the world.

IN A PIT WITH A LION ON A SNOWY DAY

In a Pit with a Lion on a Snowy Day is a great book for everyone to take a moment and read. Mark Batterson takes a portion of Scripture from 2 Samuel, that most people miss when reading, and shows the implications for our lives today. It is an enjoyable yet challenging read written by a man who does his best to chase his Lions in a way that others can watch and learn. Go forward, learn to face your Lion and then chase HIM!

Book Description

Your greatest regret at the end of your life will be the lions you didn't chase. You will regret the risks not taken, the opportunities not seized, and the dreams not pursued. Stopping running away from what scares you most and start chasing the God-ordained opportunities that cross your path.

In a Pit with a Lion on a Snowy Day is inspired by one of the most obscure yet courageous acts recorded in Scripture (II Samuel 23:20-21): Benaiah chased a lion down into a pit. Then, despite the snow and slippery ground, he caught the lion and killed it.

Unleash the lion chaser within!

Author Bio
Mark Batterson serves as lead pastor of National Community Church (www.theaterchurch.com) in Washington, DC, and is a daily blogger @ www.evotional.com. Mark lives on Capitol Hill with his wife Lora and their three children.

An excerpt from In a Pit,

"Is anybody else tired of reactive Christianity that is more known
for what it’s against than what it’s for? We’ve become far too defensive.
We’ve become far too passive. Lion chasers are proactive. They know
that playing it safe is risky. Lion chasers are always on the lookout for
God-ordained opportunities.

Maybe we’ve measured spiritual maturity the wrong way. Maybe
following Christ isn’t supposed to be as safe or as civilized as we’ve been
led to believe. Maybe Christ was more dangerous and uncivilized than our
Sunday-school flannelgraphs portrayed. Maybe God is raising up a
generation of lion chasers."

Editor, Producer, Director

Lights
Camera
and...
ACTION

Cry of a newborn
New
Life
Infancy

Childhood
Scrapes
Bruises
Bumps

School
"First
Love"
Bible
Stories
Sunday School

New
Faith
New
Life
Second
Chance

Fall
Down
Get
Up
Again

Stop
Wait
Didn't
Mean
To do
That

I'm
Sorry
Cut
Splice
Edit...

ROLL
Tape!

Middle
School
Bullies
Basketball
Youth
Group

Take
His
Name in
Vain
Regret
Pain
I'm
Sorry

Cut
Edit
Splice

ROLL
Tape!

Junior
High
First
Date

Vandelize
Make
Mistakes
Stray
From the
One
Who
LOVES...

Graduation
Comes
Goes
Bible
College
still
not
right
great
act
noone
knows

Graduation
REAL
LIFE
HITS
HARD...

Why
Did I
Walk
Away?

Renewed
Faith
I'm
Sorry
Please
Forgive

Vut
Edit
Splice

ROLL
Tape!

Work
Serious
Relationship
further
education
slowly
forget
but not
leave

Slow
Steady
Returne
Help Keep
Me onh
Track

Please
Forgive
Cut
Edit
Splice

ROLL
Tape!

New
Marraige
Selflessness
A New
Way

Begin
To Understand
chirst's
Love

Seek to
Glorify
Honor
His Name!

ROLL
ROLL
ROLL
This is
Greast!
Exactly
What I
Want
From YOU!!!

Now You
Got IT
ROLL
ROLL
ROLL

Children
Godly
Discipline
Life
Rolls
Rapidly
By!

They all
Leave
Have
Families
of their
Own

Zoom in
For the
Final
Scene

FINAL
Breathe!
As you
View
Heaven's
Gates

And...
That's...
a
WRAP!!!

CUT
EDIT
SPLICE!!!!

COMPLETE

He who has begun a good work in you is faithful to complete it.

Forgiven?
Without a doubt

But how?
To get past the guilt of what I’ve done.
I asked
He gave
But my mind won’t let me move on
It’s fresh
It’s open
It’s new
How do I combat the mind?
What should I do?

Grasping
Pleading
Begging
Looking
Searching

For peace of mind.

Why is His forgiveness not enough?

Coffee and Cigarettes

Sip
Swallow
Inhale
Exhale

Ragged
Breathe
Puff
Peace

Hack
Cough
Sip
Swallow

Calm
The burning
In my throat

Desperation
Inhale
Exhale
Sip
Swallow

Why can
I not
find
peace?

Anguish
Pain
Inhale
Exhale
Sip
Swallow

Another
Day
Another
Cigarette
Another
Cup

Maybe
Tomorrow
Will
Show the Way.

From underneath the trees, we watch the sky
Confusing stars for satellites
I never dreamed that you'd be mine
But here we are, we're here tonight

Singing Amen, I, I'm alive
Singing Amen, I, I'm alive

If everyone cared and nobody cried
If everyone loved and nobody lied
If everyone shared and swallowed their pride
Then we'd see the day when nobody died

And in the air the fireflies
Our only light in paradise
We'll show the world they were wrong
And teach them all to sing along

And as we lie beneath the stars
We realize how small we are
If they could love like you and me
Imagine what the world could be

If everyone cared and nobody cried
If everyone loved and nobody lied
If everyone shared and swallowed their pride
Then we'd see the day when nobody died
When nobody died...

I’m home…or am I?

They say that home is where your heart is…well if that’s true then I am here in the States for an extended visit. I’ve always known that I belonged in Scotland. I’ve grown up dreaming of nothing but, I’ve written poems and anthems to that affect since I was old enough to write, the large portion of my library is Scottish history and info. Why did I have to come back here?

My heart aches every time I think about home. I want to cry all the time. I don’t want to be here in the States. I know this is not where God intended me to be. I want to go HOME!!!!!

sorry guys

Okay guys I apologize that I haven't updated in quite some time. It is harder than I thought to get access in the highlands. In fact the connection I am on right now is so slow and it is dial up. I can't even download pictures for you guys to see. Hopefully we will have access at our next hotel and I will upload some pictures. Sarah I can't wait for you to see the little tams I got Garrett and BETH I can't believe you didn't come!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You'll never guess where I went last night!!! You remember the picture you painted for me? Well I actually got to go to that castle. It is the Eilean Donnan castle and it is located near the Isle of Skye. I got some video for you and a couple of pictures of it for real and a pic or two of me in front of hte castle for you. The only funny thing is that there was a film crew there while we were visiting but it wasn't for an American movie or anything. It was for a Japanese music video, how ironic and funny is that. Well anyway to everyone else, thanks for your patience and I'll do my best to update tonight. JoyAnna

September 13, 2006 Day 5

We headed out around 8:30 for our start up towards the Highlands. First stop St. Andrew’s, the city, the university and of course the golf course. I got a couple of good pictures of the course and a bunch of the ruined abbey and castle. Otherwise it was an uneventful stop. One good thing, I got to leave my Grandmum with another gentleman on the trip and I wandered off on my own. It was kind of nice.

Then it was back on the bus and we were headed off to the Glamis Palace, the childhood home of the Queen Mother. It was nice but the most interesting part was getting to see the Highland cattle. They are cute “little” things and very soft. Then it was back onto the bus and this time we headed to Aberdeen. Another couple, who are actually from Herdon near where I live, and I ended up going to a local Starbucks and chatting while having a cuppa. It was a good time. Then it was back onto the bus and we headed up the hill and slightly out of the city to our hotel.
Dinner was at seven and by then I was struggling so very badly. The gentleman that decided to sit with us loves to complain and when he complains I think everyone else figures they should to. So not only was he complaining but my Grandmum and the other woman sitting with us were as well. I was so frustrated and bored. Lucky for me the Celtic FC and Manchester United were playing right next door in the bar so I grabbed a beer and sat down with the Tour Guide to watch the game. It was great. It was kinda nice to have someone “closer” in age than 60 years difference to talk to. The game was good but Celtic lost by one which isn’t bad when you consider the score was 3-2. Manchester was expected to roll right over the top of Celtic. Then it was into the lobby for me and I have spent the last couple of hours online trying to find things to do and people to talk to.

And here are pictures from today…

again a problem downloading pics but there are a bunch on my xanga site. www.xanga.com/ChristsChild

September 11th, 2006 Day 3 and Remembrance

On this day we headed out from Carlisle, England. We had stayed at a very quaint hotel that night. They had a couple of cats running around down on the main floor and while I was down there working on blogging and downloading one of them jumped up on my lap and snuggled down there while I typed. It made me miss my beautiful Fia immensely. Shout out to Hyla and JennO for taking care of her and giving her lovin while I am gone. So anyway, as I said we headed out from there and stopped at Hadrian’s Wall. This is a stone wall that is built on the fault line of where Scotland and England came together when the Panacea broke apart. It is amazing. They built it by hand and at some places it was more than six feet high and six feet wide. For the most part now the stones have been filched by local farms for use in their own fences. There are sheep and stone fences everywhere.















Oh a couple of things I have learned here. Any place name that starts with Kirk/Kil usually means that it has a church located in the town, so Kilmarnock is church of marnock. Dun/Dum means fortress, Dumbarton-Fortress of Barton and Pit comes from the Pictish decent of the people living there. If the place is known as a Hamlet it has no church if it is a village it does have a church.

The portion of Hadrian’s wall that we saw had a small milecastle located there. And that is exactly what it was, a castle located a mile from the last. There are two milecastles between the next fortress. Thus every fortress could supply the milecastles and the milecastles could supply the lines. A pretty ingenius plan if you ask me :-). The fortress here is known as Housesteads fortress and as you can see it is only a foundation of what it used to be.

After this we finally crossed back over into Scotland and being the quinticential tourist I got my picture taken at the rock that declared I was in Scotland. :-) What can I say!!! :-)

(okay here we go again the site is giving me problems with the picture downloading)

Then we made a short stopover and WC pause at a place called Jedburgh. Here is a picture of the beautiful but ruined Jedburgh Abbey. It was quite beautiful.

Then it was on to Abbotsford House, the home of Sir Walter Scott, author of Waverly, Rob Roy and many other wonderful novels and poems. I forgot to take pictures of the inside except for my favorite room the library. In his one library he had over a thousand books in the second one he had well over 7,000. I think I have found my new “idol” ;-).

While there, in the gift shop I found a scarf that I had really been wanting and it was on sale because it had a defect. However I can’t find the defect and I am the proud owner of a cashmere scarf in the tartan of Princess Diana of Wales, Memorial. I can’t wait to wear it. It is very beautiful and will go well with my navy peacoat. Here it is with some heather.

Back on the road again we, reached Edinburgh by 2:30pm. Grandmum and I napped all afternoon and then hit the local pub for dinner. Then it was back to the hotel and we passed out for quite some time. Well at least she did. I fell asleep and then, oh the frustration, my Grandmum snores quite loudly and consistently. I have not yet had a full nights sleep. If I beat her to sleep I usually get about three hours before she starts snoring. I mean her snoring is so loud that I can’t even get my iPod up loud enough to cover it. I try to turn it up loud enough that it is soothing to me and covers her as well as I cover my head with a pillow. It just doesn’t work. Any of you reading who care, please pray that I will get some sleep each night. I am starting to get exhausted. Don’t get me wrong, I love being here with my Grandmum. Anyway…

As for it being September 11th, you don't notice it near as much here. I saw one brief thing on the bbc in the morning regarding the fact that Bush had visited all three sites of the attack but that was it. I know that I was thinking about it and how glad I was that I wasn't in the Pentagon that day. I still relive that horrific attack everytime a plane flies over where I work to land at Reagan. For those of you who don't know I work two corridors down from where the plane hit the Pentagon. When those planes fly over to land at Reagan I get chills up and down my spine and I can see the visual images as if they were happening all over again.

I know that I for one will forever remember September 11th, 2001 as a day that will live in Infamy much like December 7th, 1941. Many people lost their lives that day and many more since then. GOD bless America and the Men and Women who fight for her freedom daily.

XANGA

okay so my photos posted no problem on xanga so if you want to see the photos that go with both posts, go to www.xanga.com/ChristsChild

September 10th, Day 2

We were up at 6:00 am to pack, shower and get down to breakfast by 7:00 am. I find it funny that I am on holiday and getting up just as early as I do when I am home in the States. We were on the road by 8:15 am and headed off to our first stop, Alloway. Alloway is the birthplace of the National Poet of Scotland, Robert Burns. It was a quaint little thatched cottage. (photo at xanga) They have added much since its original production. Mostly the grounds though and not really the cottage. There are beautiful gardens and a quaint little museum. (photos at xanga)

Then it was back on the bus, well after a bit of a scare. One of the elderly ladies on our tour stumbled and fell on her face and started having a seizure. We ended up having to call the ambulance to come and check her out. It seems she was seizuring due to shock and everything was okay. One of the negatives to having all elderly folks on the tour. :-/ So then we were back on the road headed to Gretna Green. This place is famous for the blacksmith that used to marry couples on the run. It was mainly a tourist trap and not that fabulous. I didn’t get any pictures from there.

Oh yeah on our way to Gretna Green we actually stopped for a photo op in the highest town in Scotland which also happened to be the home of our tour guide. It was really neat, we got to meet his father and his dog and his father loved to share stories. I REALLY LOVE THIS COUNTRY!!! (photos at xanga)

On our way through this area I saw my first heather, though it is starting to go out of season so the hills were not purple with it but it was still a treat. I also got some fabulous pictures of the Scottish thistle. (photos at xanga)

After this we offically ended up in Gretna Green, from there we headed to Carlisle, England. We stopped and toured the castle. And of course no castle is complete unless it has a ghost. The story at this castle is based on this tower…(photo at xanga)

Supposedly in the little window near the top of the picture can be seen The Grey Lady. The story goes that this room was closed up at some point and when it was turned into a barracks in the 1800’s they opened up to make it into Sergents Quarters. When they broke down the wall they found the skeleton of a woman and small child. I saw nothing though, of course as you can see I was there in broad daylight. Oh well :-). More pictures of Carlise. (photos at xanga)

As Promised….

Well we have completed our first day of the tour. It was a long exhausting but good day. I’ll start with yesterday and pictures from then as well and then tell you about today.

September 9th, 2006 will forever remain one of the greatest days of my life. I finally reached my dream destination…Scotland. We landed in Glasgow around 2:30 – 3:00 pm.

It was an amazing experience. I actually cried, which I knew I would do. Who wouldn’t when something they have dreamed about for years is actually happening. It was just wonderful. The tour guide was there to meet us at the airport and then take us to the hotel. We stayed right smack dab in the middle of Glasgow and actually we were 3 blocks from where my Grandmum grew up.

Grandmum and I were exhausted and it was all we could do, when we got the hotel, to not lay down and sleep forever. She looked better than I did that’s for sure.

(Okay, so I'll have to post more pics later, cause this is not working.) Though I must say when I am exhausted my eyes are the color of green I have always wanted ;-). Well anyway…

We all met for dinner and a drink at 6:00 pm. There are 41 people in our tour group and I am the baby, for real!!! I am twenty-six years old and the next youngest person is 67. Yowza! I have never felt so young, which is kinda nice considering lately I have been feeling soooo old. :-)

After dinner, Grandmum and I tried to get ahold of her sister and neices, only to find that they were already on their way into the city in the hopes that we were there. It was so wonderful to finally meet these people that Grandmum always talks about.

The one in brown is my Grandmum, khaki is her sister Jess, then the one in white is Bev and then Karen. I had previously talked with “Aunt Karen” through e-mail so it was such a pleasure for me to get the chance to meet her in person. We had a lovely time meeting and chatting and catching up. I think I could easily stay here and never come back.

We made it!!!!

Okay so since I am getting requests...I can't quite post pictures yet but I do have stuff to report. We got to JFK on the 8th at 6:30 pm and flew out around 10:00pm. It was the longest hardest flight I have ever been on. I got stuck sitting in front of some pansy guy who would put his seat all the way back to rest and watch tv but if I put mine back he would tell me to put it back up because he couldn't see his tv. I think I actually started to cry, because at this point I had not slept since the 7th. I was utterly exhausted and all I wanted was a few hours sleep. We got to Amsterdam and our plane leaving from there to Glasgow was delayed. It wasn't bad though. It was great getting to hang around the airport and listen to the world. I mean you could hear every language possible. There were also some really cute young military men. :-) We finally got to Glasgow and through customs and everything else around 3pm their time. Now remember that we are 5 hours ahead of you all. I have some "fun" pictures of what I look like after not having any sleep for a couple of days.

The great thing was last night my Grandmum and I got to meet up with her sister and her neices or my Aunt Karen and Bev. It was wonderful and there are pictures to come. I have to go get on the bus. Love to all and thanks Mike for keeping me up to date about the Pats you have no idea how much I will definitely appreciate it!! God bless everyone.!!!!

Vacation

How sweet that word sounds rolling off my tongue. Not just a weekend away but a real honest to goodness vacation where I can think of nothing else but myself and the utter joy I am experiencing. I mean I am talking no cell phone and only answering e-mail if I want to. I will be blogging about my trip everyday but I won’t really have any contact with the States, it will be kind of nice. Now I know that sounds so utterly selfish but in a way I feel I deserve it.

• I worked my rear off at my old job in order to earn enough paid time off so that I would still get paid and get to go on this trip. The stinky thing is that they didn’t appreciate me and I had to leave for a better job with less PTO and the pay-out for that saved time from the old job helped cover the week that I took off between jobs.
  
• My vacation between jobs, though it was a week long was not a vacation in the sense of relaxing, think only of me one. Not that it was bad, in no way was it a terrible week, in fact besides going to Scotland, it was one of the greatest weeks of my life. I got to spend an entire week doing what I love with one of my best friends. I got to serve her by helping with all her last minute wedding details. It was great, I loved it, though I do regret I have only one picture of the two of us and it isn’t even in our dresses. What a bummer!!
  
• For the past couple of months since moving in our apartment has been affectionately known as Hostel 310. We have had people living with us since August. Now I am not complaining about this either, because God gave us the place and we have a duty to give as we are able and if someone needs a place to stay we’ll offer since it is God’s place not ours. However on the flip side, it is a little tiring to go home and have to “entertain” because you have guests and really shouldn’t go hide in your room.
• So those are some of my reason that I feel that I “deserve” to be a little selfish about thinking nothing of anything else but how much I am going to enjoy this trip. I must note though that I do realize that I would not be getting this opportunity if it weren’t for the Grace of God and the many prayers of all my friends. I know that I will definitely enjoy my time in another country, marveling at God’s magnificent creation.

You know, I realized that sometimes I tend to think that the US is all there is because it is the only thing I know. I mean I have been to Canada, but that is attached to the US so I didn’t leave the continent. I have also been to Bermuda, which is like a little slice of Britain in the Atlantic Ocean off the US. Yet again though it is still too close and you don’t need a passport to go there, just a birth certificate. I mean I am actually leaving the United States of America and stepping foot in not one but two different countries. I will be landing in Amsterdam first for a short layover before heading on to Glasgow.

Kind of stinky things though:

• missing almost the entire series of my Pastor’s Billboard series.
• missing the first two games of my football teams season.
• missing almost the entire first month of my small groups.
  (Stage Left, Alpha, and a couple of other ones I want to do that I can’t think of off the top of my head.)
• missing my friends immensely as I have finally begun to form close friendships.
• missing a possible trip to Philly where I haven’t been since I was a child.

Now these are almost all such trivial matters when compared to the big picture of finally achieving a dream I have had since I was five years old. I can always go to Philly another time and as for the football games, I can check on them online. I think it is the spiritual and friendship aspect that I will actually miss the most. I didn’t realize how much I was getting fed by talking with my friends and through Pastor Mark’s messages and my small groups.

more later…

WE ARE GO FOR TAKEOFF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I got the final call today at 5:30 pm today that everything is all good. They were able to correct the situation without incurring any fees. We are leaving from JFK airport next Friday the 8th at 10:05pm. I AM SOOOOOO EXCITED!!!!!! Thank you so much for all your prayers! I know that it was because of you all and your prayers that God made everything work out. WOOOHOOO!!!!!

Random thoughts

Let us live as though Christ were crucified yesterday, risen today, and coming tomorrow. Martin Luther

Did you know you can hit the snooze on your alarm clock so many times it doesn’t give you the option anymore? My cell is my alarm clock and I have a tendency to hit snooze in the morning so many times that after I think the 5th or 6th time it says “Alarm 5:30 am ok?” Basically my cell phone is being stubborn and refusing to be the excuse for my inability to get up in the mornings. :-)

I love when it rains because I feel like God is washing away the dirtiness of the world and all my cares and worries.

I like running in the rain because it makes me feel good.

I want a house someday where I can have a fire place with a big comfy couch in front of it to read a good book with a cup of hot tea on a rainy day.

I want a house with a big front porch with a porch swing where I can sit encompassed by the arms of the one I love, listening to the rain and talking about life.

Wait for the guy who calls you beautiful instead of hot. Wait for the guy who calls you back when you hang up on him. Wait for the guy who will lie under the stars and listen to your heart beat. What for the guy who will stay awake just to watch you sleep. Wait for the guy who kisses your forehead. Wait for the guy who wants to show you off to the world when your in sweats. Wait for the guy who prays with you. Wait for the guy who holds your hand in front of his friends. Wait for the guy who thinks you’re just as pretty without makeup. Wait for the guy who always reminds you of how much he cares and how lucky he is to have you. Wait for the guy who turns to his friends and says "that's her."

Six Topics, Ten Questions

TEN EMOTIONS.

1. are you missing someone right now? yes
2. are you happy? Waiting on a phone call and then maybe I will be happier
3. are you talking to anyone right now? nope
4. are you bored: a little
5. are you german: yes
6. are you irish: na Scottish
7. are you french: No.....
8. are you Italian: no
9. are your parents still married: 26 years and still goin
10. do you like someone right now : I plead the fifth

TEN FAVORITES.

1. store: H & M
2. flower: gerbera daisy, daisies
3. color: red, green or pink
4. sport: futball and FOOTBALL!!
5. mall: don’t go to them
6. music: anything but rap
7. food: steak, baked potato, asparagus, green beans, corn and mushrooms
8. season: FALL
9. animal: horses and dogs
10. state: the New England states

TEN FACTS.

1. hometown: Washington, DC
2. hair color: brown with natural red highlights
4. hair style: just short of shoulder length and curly
5. eye color: hazel, they change based on my mood and the color I am wearing
6. best friend: Shrig, Beth, Sarah and Pete
7. mood: slightly bored, slightly tired
8. skin color: WHITE as white can be
9. available: yeah
10. lefty/righty: right

TEN THINGS ABOUT YOUR LOVE LIFE.

1. have you ever been in love?: I thought so
2. do you believe in love: I guess
3. why did your last relationship fail: never been in one
4. have you ever been heartbroken: who hasn’t
5. have you ever broken someone's heart?: no
6. have you ever fallen for one of your best friends? Yes and will never do it again
7. have you ever liked someone but never told them that you do? Um again who hasn’t
8. are you afraid of commitment: no
9. has someone ever kissed your hand: no
10. have you ever had a secret admirer: not that I know of

TEN THINGS:

1. love or trust: both
2. hard liquor or beer: how bout neither
3. night or day: night
4. one night stands or relationships: relationships
5. television or internet: internet
6. pepsi or coke? um
7. wild night out or romantic night in: romantic night in
8. pink or blue? either
9. phone or in person: in person
10. msn or myspace: myspace

TEN HAVE Y0U EVER.

1. have you ever been caught sneaking out?: nope
2. have you ever skinny dipped: nope
3. have you ever done something you regret? Yet again who hasn’t
4. have you ever bungee jumped? nope
5. have you ever been on a house boat? nope
6. have you ever finished an entire jaw breaker: yep
7. have you ever wanted someone so badly it hurt? Um if you mean relationally, yes but if you mean physically, no
9. have you ever danced in the rain? Nope
10. have you ever been skydiving? That is a resounding YES!!!!

“No news is good news” and a different perspective

Whoever said this originally was just living in a dream world. Each day that I continue to go without news or information regarding my trip, I become more agitated and anxious. I have nine days til d-day and no confirmation on whether they have been able to book my Grandmum a new seat. This is not to say that I don’t try to get news. I think my agent will be very glad to get me on this trip and never hear from me again. I have called everyday to push them and try to find out if they know anything.

A different perspective

My good friend Pete reminded me last night, that as much as this sucks, others are still worse off. Consider, Pete just spent some time in Haiti for a mission trip. He had a great time and grew to know and love the people there. Well they just got lambasted by this tropical storm/hurricane Ernesto. Pete reminded me that they have lost their lives, livelihood and even homes and family. Me? All I may or may have lost is a trip to Scotland that I can attempt to take next year.

I need to stop being so selfish. I also started reading Job last night on the recommendation of a friend. Not that I am saying my life or situation is anything like Job’s but I can view his life as an example of how I should be reacting in these situations. So I will do my best to wake up each day until I LEAVE and remember that God is in control and no matter what happens He deserves all the honor and the praise. His will, will be done and I have to trust in the wisdom of His hand in my life.

Grad School and Scotland

How frustrating is this? I had my final yesterday for my Corporate Finance class. It was 25 questions long, all multiple choice and open book. I spent three hours pouring over that book finding the correct answers and could have sworn I had all but maybe four or five correct. When I finally finished and submitted the exam I GOT A LOUSY STINKIN 56%. ARRRRRGGGGGHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! The other frustrating thing that I am going to write the professor about, is the fact that the very first question had two possible correct answers but no option for those two. It basically gave me four different options and then an (e) none of the above, which I had to choose since I couldn’t say that only one of the answers was correct. If this was one of the answers I got wrong then I am going to fight it by turning in my answer for him to review and “correct” for me. IT IS SOOOOO FRUSTRATING!!!!

The only good thing out of all this, I NOW HAVE A SEVEN WEEK BREAK BEFORE MY NEXT CLASS!!!! I am taking only one class next semester so that I don’t have to worry about school while I am in Scotland!! But once I finish this next class in October, I am planning to take an extended break from school. I am constantly exhausted, worn out and brain fried trying to work two jobs and go to school full-time. Plus a couple of other factors I have decided that in order to be a good steward of my time, money and body I need to take a break.

In other news MUCH PRAYER WOULD BE APPRECIATED regarding my Scotland trip. Basically three days ago I was informed that the mistake the Travel agent made with my Grandmum’s name means we now have to rebook and they are trying to charge me $400 dollars for their mistake. I am angry and frustrated since they only let us know two weeks before we leave and second because I can’t afford $400 more dollars on this trip. ARRRGGHHH! Please pray that God will work in miraculous ways so that the agency pays for their mistake and my Grandmum and I make it safely and THIS September.

Super long survey!

High School: Bellefonte Area High School
Favorite pop: Mug Root Beer
Favorite band: Mercy Me, Casting Crowns
Favorite animal: Horses
Favorite weather: warm enough to go without a jacket but cool enough to wear a light sweater

Do You:
Like someone?: yeah of course, my friends
Want more piercings: Nope
Want a tattoo: No

Last:
Person you talked to in person?: my sister
Person you talked to on the phone: my mum
Person you hung out with?: my sister
Last movie watched: She’s the Man
Last movie Saw in theater: Pirates of the Carribean: Dead Man’s Chest

Have you:
Ever cried over a girl or boy: yeah
Ever been arrested: nope
Ever had a friend die: yes
Ever finished a puzzle: yes
Ever got surgery: yes many
Ever hated someone: you mean like Osama or Saddam of course :-)

Blue or red? red
Spring or Fall?: FALL, FOOTBALL!!!!!!!!

Random stuff:
Criminal record?: nope
Do you have any pets?: one cat

Level 1
() Shoplifted
() Been fired
() Been in a fist fight

Level 2
()Snuck out of your own house
(X) Had feelings for someone who didn't have them back
() Gone on a blind date

Level 3
() Had a crush on a teacher
() Skipped school
() slept with a co-worker
()Saw someone die

Level 4
(X) Been to Canada
() Been to Mexico
(X) Been on a plane

Level 5
(X) Eaten Sushi
() Been surfing.

Level 6
(X) Taken painkillers
(X) Laid on your back and watched cloud shapes go by
(X) Made a snow angel

Level 7
(X) Had a tea party
(X) Flown a kite
(X) Built a sand castle
(X) Gone puddle jumping

Level 8
(X) Jumped into a pile of leaves
(X) Gone sledding
() Cheated while playing a game
(X) Been lonely
() Fallen asleep at school

Level 9
() Used a fake ID
(X) Watched the sunset
(X) Felt an earthquake
(X) Touched a snake

Level 10
(X) Been tickled
(X) Been robbed/vandalized/had anything stolen from you

Level 11
(X) Won a contest
() Suspended/expelled from school/(lunch detention)
() Been in a motorcycle accident

Level 12
() Had braces
(X) Had deja vu...
() Danced in the moonlight

Level 13
(X) Hated the way you looked
(X) Witnessed a crime

Level 14
(X) Barefoot through the mud
(X) Been lost
(X) Swam in the ocean
(X) Felt like you were dying

Level 15
(X) Cried yourself to sleep
(X) Played cops and robbers
(X) Recently colored with crayons/colored pencils/markers
(X) Sang karaoke
(X) Paid for something with only coins

Level 16
(X) Done something you told yourself you wouldn't
() Made prank phone calls
(X) Laughed until some kind of beverage came out of your nose
(X) Caught a snowflake on your tongue

Level 17
(X) Written a letter to Santa Claus
() Been kissed under a mistletoe
(X) Looked up at the stars with someone
(X) Blown bubbles
() Made a bonfire on the beach

Level 18
(X) Have traveled more than 5 days with a car full of people
(X) Gone rollerskating/blading
(X) Had a wish come true

Level 19
X) Worn pearls
() Jumped off a bridge
(X) Ate dog food – when I was a kid
() Told a complete stranger you loved them

Level 20
(X) Sang in the shower - haha alll the time
(X) Glued your hand to something.

Level 21
( ) Got your tongue stuck to a pole
( ) Kissed a fish.
(X) Worn the opposite sex's clothes
(X) Sat on a roof top

Level 22
(X) Screamed at the top of your lungs
() Done a one-handed cartwheel
() Talked on the phone for more than 6 hours
(X) Stayed up all night

Level 23
(X) Didn't take a shower for a week-backpacking in canada
(X) Climbed a tree
(X) Had a tree house
(X) Scared to watch scary movies alone - i will only do it if all the lights on but even then I freak out

Level 24
(X) Worn a really ugly outfit to school - Yeah, more than once probably but servant day was the worst!

Level 25
() Played chicken
() Been pushed into a pool with all your clothes on
() Been told you're hot by a complete stranger
(X) Broken a bone
(X) Been easily amused - always

Level 26
(X) Caught a fish then cooked it and ate it
(X) Caught a butterfly
(X) Laughed so hard you cried
() Cried so hard you laughed

Level 27
() Cheated on a test
(X) Forgotten someone's name

Level 29
(X) Rode a roller coaster
() Went scuba-diving
(X) Had a cavity
() Black-mailed someone
() Been black-mailed

Level 30
(X) Been used
(X) Fell going up or down the stairs
() Bitten someone

THE WHO'S
Who was the last person you told I love you to? My sister
What was the last thing you ate? Cheese stick
What was the last thing you drank?: java chip freezer
What color pants are you wearing?: um nude, I am wearing a skirt
What is the closest item near you that is blue? My skirt
What are you wearing on your feet?: orange and white socks and orange and white sneakers
What instant messaging service do you use?: trillian
What do you wear more, jeans or shorts?: jeans or skirts, never shorts
What is your favorite song right now? Photograph by Nickelback
Where is your favorite place to be? Ebeneezers
Where is your phone?: on the table by me
Where is your mom?: taking a nap at home in PA
Where do you sleep?:in my bed
Where did you get the shirt you're wearing right now?: H & M
Where did you last take a car ride to? To trader joe’s

Five States in the U.S. You've Been To
1. Iowa
2. Michigan
3. Florida
4. Virginia
5. New York

Five Foods You Like
1. steak
2. tacos
3. hummus
4. beef jerky
5. salmon

Five Drinks You Adore
1. quad soy white mocha, iced or hot
2. water
3. mountain dew
4. cherry italian soda
5. hot tea cloud 9 flavor from Gong Fu in Iowa

Five Things You Love
1. God
2. My family
3. iPod
4. Cat Fia
5. my books

70 Questions to End the Summer

1. Are you in a relationship?
friendships

2. Do you hate more then 3 ppl?
nope

3. How many houses have you lived in?
do you really wanna know, let me see…1, 2, 3, 4, oh boy I could just keep going. All in all I think 14.

4. What is your favorite candy bar?
3 Musketeers

5. What are your favorite shoes?
Don’t have a favorite pair

6. Have you ever tripped someone?
Um no

7. FAVORITE SUMMER TRIP THIS YEAR?
My week in Iowa for my Best Friends wedding!!!

9. Do you own a Britney Spears CD?
Um yeah but it was a gift cause I liked the ONE song

11. Name someone that's ALWAYS on your mind.
Yeesh just one, I can’t cause there’s a couple of them. Beth, Pete, Sarah and Shrigs

12. What is your favorite music genre?
50’s, Country, Praise and Worship

13. What is your sign?
cancer

14. What time were you born?
Mid-day

15. Do you like beer?
no

16. Have you ever made a prank call?
no

17. What is the most embarrassing CD you own?
All my Nsync and before you judge, I never had a NKotB experience

18. Are you sarcastic?
sometimes

19. What is your favorite color?
Red, green, yellow, orange, pink actually all of them

20. How many watches do you own
two but I can’t wear them cause my body shuts them off

21. Summer or Winter?
summer

22. Spring or fall?
FALL

23. What is your favorite color to wear?
Green, red and pink

24. Pepsi or Sprite?
neither

25. What color is your cell phone?
silver

26. Wheres your second home?
My church family

27. Have you ever slapped someone?
Um probably somewhere in my past

28. Have you ever had a cavity?
yes

29. How many lamps are in your bedroom?
1

30. How many video games do you own?
0

31. What was your first pet?
Hickory a dog

32. Have you ever had braces?
nope n

33. Do looks matter?
Well I do need to be attracted

34. Do you use Chapstick?
No allergic to the SPF they use in it

36. American Eagle or Abercrombie?
AE

37. Are you too forgiving?
sometimes

38. How many children do you want?
I’ll figure that out when the time comes

39. Do you own something from Hot Topic?
no

40. What is your favorite breakfast?
Honey bunches of oats

41. Do you own a gun?
no

42. What was the last thing you ate?
subway

43. When was the last time you cried?
Recently I just can’t remember specifically when

44. What did you do 3 nights ago?
Worked at Ebs

45. When was the last time you went to Olive Garden?
Ages ago

46. Have you ever called your teacher mom?
no

48. What are your nicknames?
Neiner, Neenermyer,

49. Do you know anyone named Bertha?
nope

50. Have you ever been to Kentucky?
nope

51. Do you own something from Banana Republic?
yes

52. Are you thinking about somebody right now?
yep

53. Have you ever called someone Boo?
no

54. Do you smoke?
no

55. Do you own a Diamond ring?
No, don’t really care for diamonds anyway

56. Are you happy with your life right now?
Getting there

57. Do you dye your hair?
I used to but I give up, the gray is going to come whether I want it to or not

58. Does anyone like you?
My friends

59. Who's your best friend(s)
Beth, Shrigs, Sarah and Pete

60. What were you doing May of 1994?
sitting in high school wondering when the pain was gonna end (DITTO)

61. Do you own a Backstreet Boys CD?
no

62. McDonald's or Wendy's?
neither, can’t stand fast food

63. Do you like yourself?
I guess

64. Are you closer to your mother or father?
mom

65. Favorite feature(s) of the opposite sex?
eyes!

66. Are you afraid of the dark?
sometimes!

67. Have you ever eaten paste?
probably

68. Do you have a webcam?
nope

69. Have you ever been to NYC?
Many times

70. Ever fulfilled a goal?
Yes, I am leaving for Scotland in 15 days!!!! two of my goals at the beginning of the year were to get a car and go to Scotland!!!

Running

So I went running for the first time since I graduated college in 2003. I forgot how many muscles you utilize when you run. I am so stinkin sore in places I totally forgot about. The bad thing…I work at the Pentagon where I spend the entire day running all over that crazy place opening rooms. To say none the least I have been walking around with a permanent wince on my face. I think it must look pretty funny to people looking at me and wondering what the heck is wrong with that girl. :-)

The upside though is that for not having run in such a long time, I did a pretty good job of keeping up with the group. We ran for 45 min. and approximately a mile and a half. I ran for a good half an hour of that and then finished the last fifteen walking. I am going to keep it up though because it felt good and I really need to lose the weight.

Psalm 9:10

Psalm 9:10 And they that know Thy name will put their trust in Thee: for Thou, Lord, hast not forsaken them that seek Thee. Psalm 9:10

My best friend sent this to me a while ago and I have had it hanging at my desk for both my jobs now. Its funny though, how something can sit in front of you everyday and you just don’t realize its potential and truth.

I was reminded and rebuked by this verse today. First reminded that God will never forsake them that seek Him and then rebuked because I realize that as much as I love God and truly desire to know Him better I forget to put my trust in Him. I find that as a human being I consistently try to do what I can to make my life better rather than trusting it into the hands of the One who created me in His image and has great purpose in life for me.

Why do we find it so easy to place our trust in humans who will fail us and who are fallible than to take that ultimate step of complete faith and trust in The One who is infallible and completely trustworthy. To know God is to Love God. I really need to take this verse to heart and make it my personal mantra so that I remember to love and trust my life to Him completely.
What could possibly be better than that?

POETRY

Face in the Mirror

Who is that looking back at me?

Who am I?

And where am I supposed to be?

Different folks tell me

I am different things.

But why can't I just see?

Who is that looking back at me?

The days are short
The nights are long
Will anything ever be the same
Since you are gone?

You gave me hope
A reason to live.
But now I just die
With nothing to give.

You gave me love
And I thought I was something.
When you left me
Love did too and now I am nothing.

When will you return?
I need you in my life.
With you around
I know that I can survive.

The days are short
The nights are long.
Will anything ever be the same
Since you are gone?

AUTUMN

Golden Leaves

Yellow Sheaves

Chocolate Trees

Lazy Bees

Orange Flowers

Red Apples

Mellow Sun

Lotsa Fun

Apple Ciders

Hidden Spiders

Chilly Hayrides

Pumpkin Pies

Queen of the Night

Moon so Bright

King of Day

Sun so Gay

Summers End

New School Trend

School Uniform

Thunder Storm

ODE TO MY BROTHER THE MARINE

They said you'd never do it.

Tourette Syndrome blew your chances

Yet you pursued it.

I remember playing army in the sand

And in the quarry with the little green men and

Then in the woods with each other.

I remember watching you realize

That Tourette Syndrome would ruin your life

And would all your dreams deny.

I remember watching your frustration

With your twitching and noises that you

Never could seem to control.

I saw the medicines never work.

I saw your dejection from the rejection

From friends who turned to jerks.

I remember your defeating that rejection

Turning it around in another direction

By becoming "one of the boys."

I have seen your dream apprehended

To become onf the FEW, the PROUD, the SPLENDID,

A United States Marine.

Vacation!!

I have never looked so much forward to a vacation as I am this one to Scotland. I am so exhausted from work and school that I just can’t wait. I almost wish I had an extra couple of days before I left to catch up on sleep so that I could fully enjoy the entire trip to Scotland.

I have been working myself to the bone. I really need to re-evaluate my priorities. I am working full-time as a contracted employee to the Pentagon. I then work part-time as a barista at my church’s café. I also am going to Grad School full-time. On top of all that I am trying to stay involved with church and my friends. Something needs to go and I have a feeling it may be school.

I started going for my MBA for all the wrong reasons anyway and I don’t really see where I’ll ever use it. Besides stressing over classes, I am wracking up more debt that if I don’t ever use it, will just follow me for another good 10 years. YEACH!!!

For right now I just look forward to the fact that I am in the last week of my corporate finance class and then I get a 7 week break from any kind of classes. I am only taking half a semester this time so that I do not have to worry about having to find the time while in Scotland to do homework. How not fun would that be. I work at the café up to the 31st of Aug. Then I am tentatively going to Philly for Labor Day weekend. Then I have three days at the Pentagon then I am gone to SCOTLAND FOR AWHILE!!!!!!!

Who knows maybe I won’t come back!!! I’ll just find a nice little thatched cottage up in the highlands to hide away in for the rest of my life. Wouldn’t that be nice, well first find a husband to take there with me J!

Missions

So my church just finished a series of sermons/conference focusing on Missions. It is something they do every year with the slogan being “Pray, Give, Go”. The last topic was risks and risk taking. Pastor Josh Karrer put before the church that faith is basically risk. We were challenged to follow that Gut-feeling God put in us no matter what the risk. If you don’t step out in faith/risk nothing would ever get done.

So I have decided it is time to start praying and asking for prayer regarding a decision I must make. The job that I am in is a one year contract with options to stay if I prove to be valuable. Now when my contract comes up for bid next fall, I think I am going to take a month off and spend it in Scotland. Recently a young married couple left the states for Edinburgh to start an amazing ministry.

Scotland has always been my heart and passion as well as “young” people. So Lord willing and through much prayer over the next year, I am hoping to be able to take that month and go to Edinburgh and hopefully get the opportunity to work with this couple and the others there.

Please pray:

That God will provide direction
That I will honestly seek His direction
That when the time is right God will open the hearts of my bosses to grant me this time
For the Schmidgall’s in Edinburgh
For Eikon

“Little Black Book”

So I realized that I am constantly saying that I will pray for people and I realize that I write these prayer requests down on many different slips of paper. As my dearest friend Beth can attest to, in planning for her wedding, slips get lost and misplaced. So on that thought process I decided to buy a “little black book” that I could carry around with me every where to write down prayer requests as I receive them. Now I only bought it just last night but I have started transferring slips into it. I plan to also make sure to keep it with me at work so that when there is a down time I can start praying through the list. This will be a good thing for me to help me to stay in constant conversation with my Lord and Savior.

25 more days until SCOTLAND!!!!!!!!!

I Exchange...

My weariness for His strength,
My weakness for His power,
My darkness fo rHis light,
My problems for His solutions,
My burdens for His freedom,
My frustrations for His peace,
My turmoil for His calm,
My hopes for His promises,
My afflictions for His balm of comfort,
My questions for His answers,
My confusion for His knowledge,
My doubt for His assurance,
My nothingness for His awesomeness,
The temporal for the eternal,
And the impossible for the possible!

FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I almost got mugged tonight!!! What the heck is with me and this city?!?!?!?

So I ran to 7-eleven, because I was having a pity party for myself and no pity party is complete with out the gratuitous pint of ice cream. As I was walking home, mind you my apartment building is one block from the store, I hear this basketball bouncing across the street and behind me. I pay no attention cause when its bouncing you know where the kids are. Well then it stops bouncing. ALL TOGETHER, nothing, I hear no voices nothing!!! I suspected something when it stopped but then when it didn't start back up at all I was VERY suspicious. With good cause, having been mugged once I have no desire to be mugged again. If it means I am somewhat rude and "racial" then so be it, I am only that way at night!! Well the next thing I know I hear someone trip behind me and sure enough I turned around and there is this little maybe 10 or 11 year old sneaking up on me. He stopped and pretended to do, i don't know what when I turned around but I knew, I AM NOT STUPID!!! SO i sped up and turned into my building. As I am opening the door to go in I turn one more time and this kid crosses the street to join up with his two buddies as they yell at me "BITCH". Why am I the bitch when they are the ones who were going to try and mug me. Why am I the one who suffers the indignation of this insult when they are stupid little kids who should know better than to attack people or call people rude names.

WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TOO!!!???!!!??? GOD PLEASE TAKE ME HOME!!!! BY THE WAY THANK YOU FOR WATCHING OUT FOR ME!!!!!!!! I know that only You and You alone gave me the keen sense of hearing tonight and the protective arms around me. Thank you!!!!

Great Essay by Joel Stein

I really enjoyed this.

MAYBE WE SHOULD JUST MAKE MEL HAPPY
Attacking anti-Semitism hasn't got us far in 3,000 years. It's time for some changes.

Most times, when someone spouts off about how awful the Jews are, I blow it off as ignorance. If the guy just got to know us, he would totally dig us. We're funny and warm and smart and totally self-effacing. We send Ben Stiller to Iran for a few weeks, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad will be opening up Noah's bagel shops in all the strip malls in Tehran. The only problem is that with just 0.02% of the world's population, we can't do nearly as many personal appearances as we'd like. That's why we took over the media.

But Mel Gibson knows us--personally. He's been in Hollywood for more than 20 years, virtually surrounded by Jews. If Mel doesn't like us, maybe it's finally time to stop blaming everyone else for the bigotry and scapegoating and start to look at ourselves. As the saying goes, if people hate you for 1,000 years, you can blame them, if you're persecuted for 2,000 years, maybe you're unlucky; but if they still want to kill you after 3,000 years, you have to ask yourself if you're doing something wrong.

So we Jews are going to have to make some slight adjustments to get on the world's good side. No more smiting our enslavers with locusts or refusing to convert during Inquisitions or giving ourselves Oscars for Holocaust documentaries. We've got to up our likability, get on people's good sides.

The first thing we have to do is drop the Chosen Peopletm marketing bit. It's not working. Not only is it not scaring people off as it was designed to do, but it comes off as sort of arrogant. I'm suggesting we change our official slogan to Just One of the Guystm or the People Who Believe in Most of Your Bibletm or even the People Who, if History is a Guide, Are Not Among God's Favoritestm. We'll need to get Karl Rove involved.

You know how a lot of Jewish performers change their names so they don't offend anyone with all that Jewishness? Emmanuel Goldberg changed his name to Edward G. Robinson, and Jonathan Leibowitz threw us all off the trail with Jon Stewart. How about if all the rest of hte Jews do it too? I'm considering Joe Crockett. I also like the sound of Johnny Slayer. Plus, coming up with 14 million new names will be a kind of WPA project for all the Jewish writers. Because we have to back off the controlling-the-media thing a tad.

We could do ourselves a lot of good by stopping our whole Protocols of the Elders of Zion plan. It's been more than 100 years since the book has been out, and we have yet to come close to our goal of (I'm using the Iranian translation here) "extracting from the hands of the Lord many stars and galaxies." In fact, we have yet to extract one single star or glalaxy. Let's drop it! One of our methods of controlling the universe according to the book, was to get people hooked on alcohol. And look how that backfired last week.

Also, we need to stop killing other people's messiahs. O.K., it was actually the Romans who killed Jesus, but we were there. And even if it had been us, you'd think the Catholics would thanks us, since otherwise they'd have churches today full of statues of a bald old guy clutching his heart in hospice care, and who's showing up every Sunday for that? But still, it's better if we stay far away from any messiahs. Even if a guy clearly isn't the Messiah but is just saying he is--walk away. There's nothing to gain there.

Until Gibson told his arresting officers that "the Jews are responsible for all the wars in the world," I didn't realize that was our thing. If it is, let's drop it. I would have thought that the guy who made Braveheart, The Patriot, Gallipoli and When We Were Soldiers and has directed some of the most violent, angry scenes in cinema would love war. But I guess he doesn't.

And most of all, we have to stop this finger wagging at Gibson. Endeavor agent Ari Emanuels has written that no studio would work with him anymore. Bad call. We don't want to get in a battle here. In a popularity contest between Mel Gibson and Jews, it doesn't look so good for hte Jews. Better we laugh this off, maybe respond with a jibe at the Australians, like how they make simplistic, ovelry fruit-forward red wines. Then we all have a chuckle and subtle suggest another dead language for him to teach himself for his next movie. We've got to give the guy as much busywork as possible.

TIME Magazine, August 14th 2006, Page 78

SOMEDAY!!!!

I want to own a car just like this. I want to be able to get it and fix it up and listen to it purr. They really just don't make cars this way anymore.

Sometimes I think I was born in the wrong time period. Oh well what do I know. God knows best right :-).

I am utterly exhausted and need major prayer. I am stuck in a class for grad school right now, that I can't drop and I don't understand whatsoever. No one has ever called me a financial mastermind for a very good reason...I am most definitely not one. :-)

Why can't we all just stay kids???

Why can't we all just stay kids??? Why does the world have to change? Why does life have to get harder and harder to live? Why are children the only ones able to see the world as nothing but an adventure? Why are children the only ones that truly believe that God can do everything and anything? Why do we have to become so jaded and marred by the world and what it expects and wants along our growing up that we lose all sense of wonder and belief? Why do people have to move on in life? Why do we have to grow up?

I was never happier than when I was a child and my only goal in life was to dream about what I could be and have fun. I wish that I could go back to that time when I dreamed of being an astronaut and had no reason to believe it couldn't happen. I wish that I could go back to the freedom of being a child and getting to run about in the woods and play with not a care in the world. I wish that I could go back to being a child where love is what our parents give us and what we feel for our siblings, our kittens, our bicycles, our backyards, our crayons, our dolls, our hamsters, our wildflowers, our dogs, our play-time, and our general enjoyment of life, even though we don't actually understand what life is.

more pics

Dress rehearsal

Friday night was the dress rehearsal. We got the church decorated that afternoon, besides having to deal with the nusiance of a drum kit the church they rented refused to move, everything went off without a hitch. The church looked beautiful and the greenery was lush.


We ran through the wedding three times, once very quickly, once full scale and another again a quickie. We got out of there by 6pm and headed to Chips for the rehearsal dinner. It was very good and very interesting. It is basically a restuarant that makes a conglomeration of American food. I had a ribeye steak with salad, mashed potatoes and broccoli. It was excellent.

After that the girls all headed back to Beth's place for another quick little shower with all the bridesmaids. It was very sweet and well put together by Beth's sister Jenny. That lasted until approximately 10ish. Then Beth and I followed two of the bridesmaid's to their hotel in order to get them checked in and then headed home. Beth jumped in the shower and then hopped into bed. She fell dead asleep while I was giving her a massage around midnight and slept like a log until 6:30am. It was very good for her. I was very worried that she wouldn't be able to sleep the night before her wedding, so I basically begged God all night that she would sleep well and be refreshed the next day.

Here are some pics from the decorating, rehearsal, dinner, and the bridesmaid's shower.

First a better picture of the happy couple, now Luke and Elizabeth Strahan (pronounced stran)

Okay so I'll have to post more pics later cause the heat is making the internet running excessively slow. Sorry, keep posted though